The End.

With the end of November comes the end of NaBloPoMo. For those of you who have read everyday, stopped by every once and a while, or just once, thanks for stopping by! I have actually really enjoyed posting daily. Although I can't promise you anything, I am going to try and post more often, and eventually I will finish 30 Days of Truth.
Enjoy your December and holiday season. Oh and guys, this is also the day you get to shave off those hideous mustaches!

Feelings

Ever feel like you were just left somewhere to rust, forgotten and no longer wanted? I feel for this truck I found in a bush at a park this summer. Makes me think of Toy Story.

My Mommy's Home!!

I had an actual post for tonight but it will have to wait as my mom got back from her two week tour of Egypt and Israel!! SHE WALKED WHERE JESUS WALKED!!! How cool is that?!?!
We spent the last couple hours talking about her trip and what she saw. I'm so jealous and need to go there now!!

Anyway I got a couple presents which I will share with you tomorrow, but for now it's bedtime as I have class in the am.

How's Your Movember Growing?

Chai

I love it! I love the richness of the spices and the cream and the smell! mmmm!!! but yesterday I was told I had to cut all caffeine from my diet until we figure out why I have been lightheaded and dizzy for a week.
I am telling myself this isn't 'goodbye chai' but 'see you soon'.

30DOT will be continued when I actually am able to sit down and think about my answers. Right now any vertical position can only be held for short periods of time. I know...I'm falling apart.

Happy Birthday!!

"The secret to staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age." - Lucille Ball

Happy Birthday to my dear, lovely cousin! I wish you love, beauty and joy in the years to come!

Sick Again!

And no I'm not pregnant!

But it is supposed to snow 15cm tonight! That is wonderful news!! Let's hope I'm still alive and well enough to enjoy it!

Sent from my iPhone again. No big surprise there.

Baby It's Cold Outside

Tonight I braved this horrible November weather* to join my friend Jared Hazzard in the release of his debut EP Allagash. He's an amazing artist and you should go onto iTunes and download it! It was a great night of music and I'm looking forward to hearing some more of his new stuff Dec 4 at Blenz at Maple and Broadway. Yes that is a plug! Being "married" to a musician has it's perks, access to great local music! Jen Miller, Jared Hazzard, Brandy McCallum, and Freddie Mojallal from Autumn Portrait will be playing some acoustic awesomeness from 7 til 10! Come out!!

Sent from my iPhone again. It's NaBloPoMo and I gotta post somehow!

*For those of you laughing at the "horrible" Vancouver weather you should know I grew up in Northern BC and do know what winter/-35/-40 feels like. I moved to Vancouver for a reason. I am now acclimatized and I'm okay with it.

Did you know...

•that the stomach flu sucks?
•not having an Internet connection sucks?
•both of those at the same time and not having cable really sucks!?
•missing 2.5 days of acting school puts you really far behind?!
•going to bed early because you are really tired only makes you wake up really really early!?
•having somebody come home after you've had a really crappy day to do dishes and then sing/play you really pretty songs is really nice?!

Well now you do.

Again Sent from my iPhone using what little data I have left.

The Internets Have Failed Me Again

But that's probably for a good thing as tonight I finally had absolutely nothing to keep me away from my homework. So for the last hour and a bit I have been memorizing Martin Luther King Jr's "I have a dream" speech. So far I have just over half served to memory! With just less than three weeks to final performance, I think I'm doing pretty well.

NaBloPoMo, I'm thankful we are nearing our departure for another year.

Sent from my iPhone

Snow, snow, snow!

Last night I wished for snow, snow, snow! (Robert Munsch anyone?) All I got was snow, but it was enough to make me smile, giggle with joy, and happily don my boots and mittens to go play in the snow!Frosty the Snowman #1 of 7.5. We had a lot of fun at work today :)

30DOT to be continued...

30DOT: Judgement

Day 18 → Your views on gay marriage.
Please read the whole way through and don't judge on the first couple of sentences.

I am a Christian, thus I believe that the Bible is truth. The Bible says in both the old (Leviticus 18:22) and the new (1 Corinthians 6:9-10) testaments that homosexuality is a sin. Just going by that alone, I would have to say that homosexuality is wrong. I was raised to believe that marriage is for a man and a woman who love each other deeply and are committing their lives to each other.

BUT! If I believe that the Bible is truth than I also have to believe the other verses such as Matthew 7:1-5, Luke 6:37, and Romans 14:1-13 which all command us to not judge are also true. So who am I to judge whether one persons "sins" are greater than my "sins."

I believe that people should be accepted for who they are, not for what they look like, where they are from, who they love. I believe that people should be able to marry whomever they want. Canada and the USA both claim to be free nations, but how can they be when people are not free to be themselves?

Tomorrow's Truth: Religion

30DOT: 10 Things

Day 17 → A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.

Ten Things Every Child With Autism Wishes You Knew by Ellen Notbohm

To be completely honest I haven't finished reading this book yet, but what I have read so far really has changed my views on Autism.

Just over a year ago I began working as a childcare worker/behaviour support worker with youth who have autism. I didn't really understand what Autism was then, and I still really only know the basics. This book is a real eye opener.

Ten Things zeros in on the importance of sensory issues and thoroughly explains their direct link to a child's behavior. Ellen reminds parents that "seemingly inexplicable behavior ... all have a sensory cause ... No matter how unprovoked, how random it may appear, behavior never comes out of nowhere." She guides parents through reformatting their own beliefs and suggests ways to identify and work with the child's sensory structure... - Amazon Commenter

The kids I work with are amazing and I really wish people would realize just how unique they are, and not treat them like they have a disease. If you are the least bit interested, go find this book and read it!

Let's Take a Break...

30 Days of Truth will be continued tomorrow. I just needed a break aka I didn't want to answer today's yet.

Photo Break:

A couple of weeks ago I asked Heather if she would be interested in shooting a guy. She said yes of course, and when she came to visit me last week she shot my friend Stu. He needed some new head shots, she needed some portfolio work, I figured they could help each other out. I tagged along with my camera and snuck in a few shots here and there. This is one of my favourites:I'll share more when I have time to edit them.

30DOT: Smoke

Day 16 → Someone or something you definitely could live without.

I hate smokers. As people, I'm sure most of them are really swell people, but it's their habit that I do not like. It smells bad in the air. It smells bad on their breath. It smells bad on their clothes. It smells bad on their skin. It's gross, and dirty, and makes me sick. I plan to live a long, healthy life, and if I end up with lung cancer from second hand smoke, I swear someone else will be dying too!

If you are a smoker, please don't be offended. I know that no matter what I say, or the government says, or your loved ones say you won't quit until you choose to do it for you, so please, for yourself (and for the rest of us!) consider quitting.

Tomorrow's Truth: Book Report

30DOT: Fallen Hero and Facebook

Since I missed one day and these work together:

Day 14 → A hero that has let you down. (letter)

Day 15 → Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.

Dear Facebook,

When I first discovered you in my first year of university, I was expecting you to be just another MySpace, Hi5, and ummm whatever those other pages were, but you were different. You didn't allow for expression of individuality with your one colour option and lack of music and glittery add -ons (THANK YOU!). You did have lots off different applications though: quizzes, photos, videos, super walls, and games. You enabled me to stay in touch with everyone from my past, present and future. I had a place to show my friends and family what I was up to, both with statuses and photos. I could share that I was in a new relationship. I could share about how awesome our dates were. I could share how classes were going...or weren't going. I could easily find all this information and more about my "Facebook friends." I soon discovered that you were a much better form of procrastination then reading non school related books, playing online games and The Sims 2.

It's been 6 years, and I must say that I have enjoyed you. You have gotten me in contact with people I never stayed in contact with, some for a reason. I was not friends with people in high school who threatened me regularly for a reason, why would I want to be "Facebook Friends" with them now. You have also made it easier for people to stalk me. My privacy settings are as private as I can get them, and yet people still manage to find me. Not cool. I have accepted this as something I will have to deal with in trade for your other better qualities, but you keep changing your privacy settings and make it harder and harder for me. I have almost deleted you so many times! Almost....but then I would lose all the progress on my Farmville, which is a very sad fact in itself.

I spend too much time on you. My life is no longer as private as it once was. I know at some point I will probably delete you, but that time is not yet. I am too dependent on you. I mean, who even asks for email addresses or phone numbers anymore?! It's usually "Are you on Facebook?" "Yeah I am search for 'Lucy Lee'" "Sweet I'll add you when I get home/right now on my iPhone." "Yay we'll be friends forever!" Ok so maybe not quite, but you know what I mean.

Anyway this past month I was disconnected from the internet and have rediscovered the joy of reading, albeit what I'm reading is not great literature it is entertaining. I will not be seeing you as much unless my phone happens to be near a free WiFi (yeah yeah I know, I read the news: hackers etc.) or I get that incredible urge and use my 3G. Damn you iPhone!

Now where is that homework....

Tomorrow's truth: Living Without

30DOT: T.Swizzle

Day 13 → A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)

Dear Taylor Swift,

As much as I hate to say it, I used to not be able to stand your music. I don't especially like your first album, but I must say your last 2.5 have really been enjoyable.

Fearless:
A dear friend introduced me to your Fearless album when I was having a particularly bad experience with a boy. She felt I should listen to the album, especially one song, "Hey Stephen," and after listening to a few more, and then eventually the whole album, I fell in love. You seemed to put exactly what I (and most likely every other 13-30+ single female) was feeling into all of your songs. I began listening to the album over and over, and can actually put a person to almost all of the songs. Fifteen & Forever and Always: my high school sweetheart. Breathe: my "college" sweetheart. Hey Stephen & You Belong with Me: my summer fling. Seriously, how did you get into my head?! Oh and I can't forget that this album now also reminds me of Florida! It played EVERYWHERE while I was there!

Speak Now:
I was very excited for this album to be released. Truth be told, I was a little wary after you released those not so awesome additional 6 songs on Fearless Platinum, but was pleased with this new album. Although I haven't "lived" as many of these songs, I love them.
I have been in a Speak Now situation, but I stayed home instead of speaking out, and it was the right decision! What a mistake that would have been! Haunted....oh haunted. Better than Revenge, The Story of Us: my 'one who got away'. Enchanted: smiles...that's a bit of a current smile :)

You have this wonderful ability to tell a story through your music. So thank you on behalf of all women who listen to you. You have told our story, and helped us feel not as alone as we feel.

30DOT: Please Stop

Day 12 → Something you never get compliments on.

Ok so only once in my life can I remember someone asking me to stop this one particular thing, but it has stuck with me ever since. I actually have only recently done it again in public/in front of people. It's always something I have wanted to be good at, especially because I have so many friends and family who are so blessed in the particular way. I've even considered getting lessons, just so I could have the confidence to do it in public.

I would LOVE to be able to sing. Absolutely love it! I have recently taught myself how to play guitar, and one of these days I will get a keyboard and reteach myself how to play, and then, just maybe, I'll have the confidence to share the world, or at least my very close and personal friends, something I love to do in the shower and when no one is home.

Tomorrow Truth: Dear [Musical Artist]....

Internet Fail

Unfortunately my Internet is disconnected and I can seem to uhhh borrow a connection, so I am attempting to post by email through my phone. High tech I know.

Today I enjoyed the company of my mother and didn't get a chance to post earlier. :)

30 DOT will continue tomorrow when I get to a wifi connection.

Sent from my iPhone

30DOT: Wow! You have really beautiful...

...eyes!

Day 11 → Something people seem to compliment you the most on.

It is always the same thing...."wow you have beautiful eyes! Are they real?"
I love my eyes, I do, they are such an incredible blue! But, I really am getting sick of people asking me if my eyes are real. I understand that some people wear contacts, but you can usually still tell if it's fake. And what do you really say to that? "No, I'm blind in both eyes and these are glass eyes!" Which, really, would be quite insensitive of me considering my brother does have a glass eye.
I usually say "yes, these are real." but it just seems like such a strange question to ask someone!
One day these babies are gonna get me a job though, and make me recognizable world round!

Tomorrow: No compliments...

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Today is Remembrance Day here in Canada. I went to the ceremony at the cenotaph in Victory Square. It was wonderful to see so many people there! and such a wide range of ages!
I am so thankful to all the men and women who have and are currently serving our country. My life would not be the same. Thank you for your commitment. It was wonderful to hear at today's ceremony that we remember and thank the men and women for their sacrifices, physically, psychologically, emotionally and spiritually.

My grandfather served in Italy during WWII. Although he returned alive, he had been damaged psychologically. One of the great stories that is told about him was that he came across a child German soldier who he told" Get the hell outta here. I don't want to kill you." and then let the kid go. My grandfather wasn't very old when he served either. I unfortunately did not get to meet him, but I thank him for his commitment.

30DOT: Let Go

Day 10 → Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.

Truth be told, as that is the name of this game, I don't believe there is anyone in my life that is toxic enough to wish I didn't know, nor that I feel the need to let go. Everyone I have in my life, or have had in my life, I have learned and hopefully grown because of the relationship.

You may say this is a cop-out answer, but it is my truth.

Tomorrow: Compliments

30DOT: Letting Go

Day 09 → Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.

This one, although I have not wanted to do, is actually quite easy: my two best friends in high school. We did everything together. We said we were sisters, and told each other EVERYTHING! The three of us have drifted apart, and I miss them dearly. One has a kid, who I never get to see, and the other just recently moved to the island, so is somewhat closer, but I have not gotten to see yet.

I am very envious of people who are still close friends with their high school friends. I know it's more likely to stay close with the friends you meet in college, but I miss my girls.

Tomorrow: Needing to let go

PS I no longer have internet, so I am hoping to be able to finish NaBloPoMo. I will be coffee shopping and searching for free wifi!

30DOT: On Dwelling

Day 08 → Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like sh**.

Yes, I censored. I'm not a fan of swearing just for the sake of swearing. I'm not self-righteous or anything, I just think there are more creative ways to get your point across.

Back to today's topic: someone who made my life hell, etc.

This is kinda a tough subject for me. I don't really feel there has really been any point in my life that was "hell." There were a lot of really tough situations: high school drama, university profs treating me like crap, university dorm drama, boys who broke my heart, girls that are still mean, etc. I used to take things really personally (see day one) and I still do, but I really try to put things behind me. I don't want to dwell on the bad things in life, because in my experience those who do are really unhappy people to be around. I want to be someone who people are drawn to, not repelled from.

So yes, I have had my fair share of unpleasant people and situations in my life. If you really want to hear about them become a close personal friend and take me out for chai on a bad day. Seriously, I will vent! And I will enjoy it! But I don't feel a public blog is the place to do that.

The next 2 days: letting go.

30DOT: Spoken For

Day 07 → Someone who has made your life worth living for.

I was 4 years old when I met the most influential person in my life. I didn't quite understand the depth of our relationship at the time, nor did I understand for years to come. Our relationship has definitely not been easy. There have been times where I have ignored Him. There have been times where I have not wanted to be His friend anymore. But through it all, I know He has always been there for me. This past summer marked our 21 year anniversary.

Some of you probably know to whom I am referring (that correction was just for you Heather). The "someone" for whom has made my life worth living would be Jesus (and no that's not the Mexican guy living down the street).

On March 7, 2009 I got a tattoo on my foot with the words Spoken For. If you have never heard the song Spoken For by Mercy Me you can click here. It was the inspiration for the tattoo. I know that through my relationship with Christ my heart is already spoken for, both by Him and the man He has chosen for me. You will find out more about my personal views on Religion later this month, so I won't elaborate now. I will say this: He, Christ, is worth living for.

Tomorrow: Someone who made your life hell.

30DOT: Hopes 2

Day 06 → Something you hope you never have to do.

Again there are a lot of things I hope to never have to do. I hope to never have to fight a disease such as cancer. I hope to never have to bury a child. I hope to never have to say goodbye to a loved one. I hope to never have to live on the streets. I hope to never be in an abusive relationship. I hope to never have to give up on my dreams (see yesterdays post). I hope to never be persecuted for my beliefs.

But here's the thing: even if I do have to do any of these I know that I will be able to survive, because I know that God will never give me anything that I can not handle.

Tomorrow: Someone who has made your life worth living for.

30DOT: Hopes and Dreams

Day 05 → Something you hope to do in your life.

Oh, where to start with this one?! I have so many things that I plan to do in my lifetime! If I were to narrow it down to my top 3, it would go something like this:

1. Get married to the love of my life.
I have had my wedding planned out for several years now. I'm a girl...I started planning it when I was in elementary school! Now all I need is a groom. Even if I don't get the wedding of my dreams, I know I will have the man of my dreams.

2. Have a family.
I have also always dreamed of having a family. I am a very nurturing person and love kids. I know that right now I am far to young to have children, so I am completely willing to wait on this one. Right now I like babies/kids as long as they are happy and cute and have parents I can send them back to.

3. Act in a movie/tv show.
The only career I have ever REALLY wanted was to be an actor. I love it. It's tough work, but so incredibly fun! My dad always told me to do what I love and the money will come. So although it's tough right now, I know all my training will pay off one day, and you will see me on the silver screen!

Tomorrow: Something you hope you never have to do.

30DOT: Forgiveness

Day 04 → Something you have to forgive someone for.

Can I skip this one please? It's hard enough admitting to myself and the world that I need to forgive myself for something, but now I have to admit I have to forgive someone else for something!

OK fine! This one is more admitting to myself and the person if they ever come across this post. PostSecret style:



Tomorrow: Something you hope to do in your life.

30DOT: Self-Forgiveness

Day 03 → Something you have to forgive yourself for.

They sat on the steps late one night. He could tell something wasn't quite right. She could tell something wasn't quite right. Although they had spent the day together, he had barely spoken to her all day. She had barely said anything to him all day. He asked her what was wrong. She began to cry. She didn't want to admit anything. He asked if she wanted to continue. She said "I don't know." He asked her if she still loved him. She said "I don't know." She cried the whole way home.

They met up a few days later. She told him it was over. She cried. He cried. They parted ways.

Truth: Giving up to easily.

Love: Inner Geek

Day 02 → Something you love about yourself.

There are a lot of things I like about myself, but one thing I absolutely LOVE about myself is my inner geek. I read/collect comic books. I love it. I have electronic comics on my iPhone so when I have some down time I always have something I can read. It's wonderful. I am more of a fan of the Marvel Universe than the DC Universe, but DC does have some entertaining reads. They also make some pretty awesome animated movies.
One thing that really makes me happy is when I can join in on a conversation with a bunch of guys and the looks on their faces when they realize that I actually know what they are talking about and have an opinion as well. I am more than just a pretty face boys!


On the loving yourself topic, I have to tell you about an amazing book that is coming out soon!!! The Beauty of Different by Karen Walrond is available Nov 15th!! Karen is an amazing photographer and women! You can read about the book and watch the trailer here and you can even enter to win one of her fabulous press kits by leaving Karen a comment here! I seriously want to win this! And even if I don't win I will be eagerly awaiting to flip through my copy as soon as I buy one! This will make a great Christmas present too for any beautiful women in your life!

A Month of Truths

I have made my decision. I will be attempting NaBloPoMo again this year. In order to give myself something to look forward/plan to write about I am also going to to attempt 30 Days of Truth, which was suggested to me by the lovely Heather. This may get a little awkward, difficult, funny, sad, fun, etc, so whether you are just passing through or a returning reader, welcome to a glimpse into my life.

Day 01 → Something you hate about yourself.

My brain. It is the reason for a lot of my unhappiness in life. I think too much. I over analyze far too much, which often leads to me thinking that everything is about me, and not in a good way. This happened once where my roommate wrote a song and I totally thought it was about me trying to steal a guy from another girl, when really it was based on her watching too much tv.
I can walk into a conversation and immediately think people are talking badly about me. It's what makes it very difficult for me to make friends sometimes.
My brain also is at fault for my self-image problems. I don't want to go too much into it right now, but let's just say I am not a fan of the standards the fashion industry has placed upon women. The world has told us for far too long how we should look, act, feel, etc. And unfortunately, my brain succumbed to it all, but that's changing.....

Tomorrow's truth: Something you love about yourself.